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Why the Fourth Finger?

According to the Chinese, there is a reason why the wedding band is designated for the fourth finger. They think that each digit constitutes an important person in your life; similar to how a palm reader views each hand crease as a representation of life, heart, and head. Below is each finger and who they stand for according to Chinese belief.

Thumb - Parents

Index Finger - Siblings

Middle Finger – Self

Ring Finger – Life partner

Pinky Finger – Children

They further explain their reasoning with a hand demonstration which metaphorically conveys each finger's significance, as shown in the picture.

1. Place your open palms face to face.
2. Bend the middle fingers until the knuckles are touching - hold them back together.
3. Make sure that the remaining fingers are open and spread out.
4. Touch the tips of your thumbs together.
5. Join the tips of the remaining fingers.
6. Press your hands together.

Now to try to separate the thumbs - you'll find that you can do so easily. The Chinese believe that this is because your parents were not to meant to live with you forever. Eventually, they must leave and allow you to grow up and become your own person. You can also easily separate the index fingers; the digits which represent your siblings. These open up because your brothers and sisters will also branch out and start families of their own. Although they will always remain an integral part of your life, they will come and go.

After joining your index fingers together, try to divide your little fingers. You'll find that this is also easy enough to do. These fingers represent your children – who, just like your siblings and parents, will also leave the family unit and begin a life apart from the family you've created with them.

Next, try to disconnect your ring fingers. You'll find that this is impossible to accomplish without separating the middle fingers which represent the “self.” According to Chinese notion, this is because husband and wife were never meant to be isolated; marriage binds them together for the rest of their lives. By disjointing the ring fingers, you essentially break away the “self.”
 

How we Do Our Garter and Bouquet

THIS FORMAT IS OPTIONAL AND LEFT TO YOUR DISCRETION!!

Our format is to call upon all of the single women in the room first.  We have both the bride and groom involved with both segments.  When we have all of the single ladies on the dance floor, we begin by telling them that the bride has informed us that she never dreamed how fantastic marriage has been so far (all 4 or 5 hours) and we have the groom kiss her passionately just to prove it.  We then say that the bride is sad to see all the ladies she cares about, so lonely and unwed and that the only way they are ever going to attract a husband is if they dance (boom....in comes dance music usually fantasy by Mariah Carey.  After the ladies dance for a bit, which is not hard to get them to do, we have the bride toss the bouquet.  Next we ask all of the single men to the dance floor because this is the fun part.  When they arrive on the dance floor in front of the seated bride we tell them to show the bride what she's missing now that she's married.  We use the song you can leave your hat on by Joe Cocker which is a sauntering kind of song that usually makes any man with a drink in him start dancing provocatively.  We will usually have two fools or so ready to strut their stuff, but if no one starts to dance we start hounding them and saying what terrible spouse's the ones that aren't dancing would be and that they can't even do simple commands.  Either way we get them dancing and when they've put on enough of a show, we tell the groom to go out and join his so called friends and show them how a real man dances.  he must then crawl in to get the garter (optional).  The music we choose for the Garter is You Can Leave Your Hat On by Joe Cocker and if you would like a separate song for the groom is easily blended in.

Old Customs

In early days, men had to capture their brides with the help of their friends.  The "best man" would distract the bride's family while the groom kidnapped her.  The "maids" would stay with her to comfort her and protect her.  The couple would go into hiding for the month to get to know each other better.  This is now called the honeymoon.  When the couple returned, it was the best mans duty to unite the families in friendship.  Later, men began purchasing their wives instead of kidnapping.  Families figured that if the man had enough money he would be able to keep care of their daughter.  

Superstitions

Flower Meanings

Red Roses............................Love

Red & White Roses...............Unity

Carnations....................Pure Love

Daisies...Intimate, Sharing feelings

Honeysuckle...................Devotion

Violets.......................Faithfulness

Lilies

Buttercups........................Wealth